From the answers here I say most men have certain (sometimes bizarre!) fantasies, but actually have no idea - or are unwilling to tell - what actually makes them ‘fall in love’ with women.
My answer is not pretty. I am going, to tell the truth about men regards women they ‘fall in love’ with and marry.
Basically, a man falls in love with the woman who can best fulfill his EGO.
But every man has different ego needs. One man may prize women who are high maintenance, as this fulfills their ego need of being the partner of someone who is the high status (which can lend him the status which he lacks on his own). Such a man will easily ‘fall in love’ with a woman who fulfills that characteristic.
Another man’s ego need may be to be adored by his woman (because in real life he feels he has never received the due credit he feels he deserves), so he will choose a women who desperately need him and praises him to the skies and takes no credit for herself. He will ‘fall in love’ with such a woman, even if she is not very pretty - even in his eyes.
The real dirty SECRET: most men choose to commit to a woman who CONTROLS them - and whom they do not mind being controlled by and are not looking to escape from the control of. And yet they will NEVER ADMIT that they are happy to accept being controlled - basically, the control needs to be covert, subtle, undetectable, so that the man can feel like he is still ‘the man’.
This is where the ‘modern and independent’ women who give their man ‘freedom’ and ‘trust’ usually lose out. The mistake they make is that they think that if they give a man REAL freedom and trust, they are showing the man respect, which will make him respect her more - and based on that respect, he will ‘fall in love’ with her.
WRONG.
Instead, a woman who ‘acts’ a little bit insecure, who makes him aware that she notices that he notices other women, suggests to him that she is afraid he may leave her and so she overtly acts in certain ways to keep him close to her - makes the man feel that he is needed and he feels like he holds power. So the woman who acts a little possessive, weak, needy - and acts a BIT controlling due to that - usually fulfills his ego need - making him feel wanted and needed.
Also, most men will ‘fall in love’ with a woman they feel is very good - AS LONG AS she always remains a bit inferior’ to him - maybe the girl is insecure, maybe she is not too intelligent (ie. smart but not smarter than him), maybe she is a bit emotionally ‘weak’ and needy of him.
Men do not usually like to ‘look up to’ their woman - they like to be LOOKED UP TO. A woman who looks up to a man can more easily make him ‘fall in love’ with her. Conversely, if a man comes across a woman who is worthy of respect, who they can't help but look up to, they tend to feel not ‘in love’ but instead, intimidated, and uncomfortable of how to exactly act/respond. Men rarely know how to actually treat a woman who inspires true respect from him - rather he will shy away and avoid her - because his ego need is not to ‘look up to’ but to be ‘looked up to’.
Discrepancies lie in what women THINK will make a man all in love with her (mainly based on myths popularised by media), what men THINK to make them all in love with a woman, versus what men ACTUALLY need, want, and respond to.
In fact, most men who think they have ‘fallen in love’ are actually not really in love - they are INFATUATED. That is clear from the many answers here given by men as well. Their infatuation is NOT with the real woman, but an idea or fantasy they have of her. A man can read many things into a woman’s words, movements, characteristics, etc and give them (undeserved) meaning/significance - simply because they are ALREADY ‘in love’ with her. If he was not ‘in love’ with her, then those very exact same words, movements, characteristics - will be perceived as dumb/ psycho/ nymphomaniac/unappealing /crazy
2 Comments
Man falls in love with a woman because..
ReplyDeleteHis number desire the need and want for approval and validation. This can mean many ways of showing that; and I can mention some. That she shows him affection, she behaves in a feminine way in recipocrating his flirtatious ways and she shows vulnerability to him. She makes him feel special, needed, wanted in her life. When she sees him or hears from him she is excited, it feels like she has been waiting to hear from him. He is wanted. He is needed. He is loved.
How so many women especially young women fail in this first one is crazy. You’d not believe how women know this is important to them too and yet expect it from man but do not recipocrate in the same manner. It ends disasterously later on.
When he feels that hs existence in her life makes her life or outlook in life better. He sees and he hears when he receives text from her, phone calls or when face to face intereactions; that she is happy because a man wants to feel he is the hero of her life, whether she can take care of herself, it means a lot to the man.
However, if he finds out she is always complaining about life, about how hard it is with him in her life, how difficult long distance is, or how difficult it has been due to whatever challenges, he begins to feel that him being in her life does not bring her happiness, does not make a different and he has failed. He learns he is not her hero and that later transforms to not wanting to feel this way and it pushes him away from her.
He learns that his love for her is a burden and everytime she behaves like this and says these words, paints images in his head that create negative toxic sensations that slowly kills his feelings for her.
He feels safe in her presence. In the world man lives in, he has discovered showing emotions and vulnerability is a bad idea. Even if women say they want to see that in a man, men have experienced they are taken for granted, and it can be used against them. When he feels safe in her presence, where he feels he can show his inhibitations i.e. he can relax showing all of him to her which he won’t out in general day to day living with other people.
When he knows he can trust her with his most deepest fantasies and knows she will not judge him, make drama about it, and instead she desire to explore some or all with him.
When he feels he can communicate with her about anything and she will listen, she will not judge, critcise but have empathy and understanding. There is no making it all about herself with crying, sobbing and devaluing him. She gets it. She’s listening to how he feels. When he experiences this then he has seen what it’s like with her in the future. Not only is she a woman but she is also his lover, partner he can share all he feels with her and they work together solving the issue at hand.
If it happens the opposite, with her getting upset, angry, sobbing and being melodramtic; to also devalue him; then he has learned he can never be open with her and her behaviour, or the relationship or how he feels or desires, less he is judged. He doesn’t see a long term future with her. She reminds him of what he hates about the world.
Put them together; he sees and feels the future with her. He wants to create memories with her and have a future with her.
I do not consider a love story due to fate.
ReplyDeleteIt is sometimes the art of a girl that makes him fall in love.
A man falls in love with a woman when he satisfies her something, I'm not saying sex here.
Usually, a man falls in love with a woman when he has met the following 3 things:
1. Respect: this is essential to a relationship, regardless of him or you all take this very seriously.
2. Understanding, will share: If you are a woman, you should understand everything about the man you like. For example his thoughts, his life ... in general it is his daily life problems ... These are a powerful tool to help you succeed in the relationship.
3. Stimulate a man's instinct, a man's heroic instinct, he will be grateful to you. For example, he is a quiet, shy person ... or if you activate him he will become strong and help him out of his obsession. Readers of this article will understand better.
What does he need from you, do you know?
If a girl can only do the above 3 things, nothing more is needed. I guarantee that man will fall in love with you.